It’s good to move in silence if you want a peaceful life where the opinions, criticisms, and destructive behaviors of others aren’t constantly tearing you down. The less you share gives less room for your name to be the topic of another person’s gossip club.
According to the Good Girl Movement, to move in silence means: “Moving in silence is taking actions and steps to work on something bigger in your life without announcing its progress. This applies to any project, purchase, job, relationship, or event that can turn the fate of your life.”
Here are 5 tips that will explain how to move in silence in life:
1. Protect Your Privacy
Your private life should be private. Your private life includes your emotions, friendship issues, romantic relationships, sex life, finances, goals, and business plans.
Your private information shouldn’t be on display for the judgment and criticism of the people around you. And you shouldn’t be letting people into your private space that speak down to you and make you feel uncomfortable. And you definitely shouldn’t share your personal life with people that will use your vulnerability and secrets as a weapon to attack you with.
Imagine that you have a safe with 5 million dollars. Who would you give the access code to? Would you give it to a friend that spills all the tea? Would you give it to a man you’re into for a month? Would you give it to someone that you have fun with? And would you give it to someone when you’re constantly evaluating their motives and behaviors? Would you give it to the friend you’re always there for, but they’re never there to support you?
Let’s take this another step. Did you know your heart and body is worth more than 5 million dollars? So, take your time and get to know people before letting them into your private space. Sometimes we are way too excited to share the intimate corners of our heart with people that are NOT our close friends. And everyone is not your REAL friend. I’ve had to learn this the HARD way.
In the past, I would share information about a crush, sex, my emotional lows, friendship issues, financial goals, and other deep personal things about my self to almost anyone. In some cases, people would use these things to belittle me, judge me, manipulate me, force their advice on me, and disregard me. I realized, I was the one opening myself up to unsafe people and putting myself in toxic situations.
You DESERVE to be surrounded by people that want to GROW, love you well, and become better people daily!
Related Quiz: Are you in a TOXIC friendship or relationship?
“Silence is a true friend who never betrays.” – Confucius
2. Protect Your Dreams
You are usually at your most vulnerable place when you’re about to take a risk and make moves toward your DREAM life. At that moment, It’s important that you protect your heart, excitement, goals, and vision.
Why should you protect your vision?
1. People have limited ability to see what you see and they can discourage you.
2. Well meaning people will filter your dreams through their failures and disappointments.
3. Sometimes people are jealous and will work to destroy your vision.
4. You don’t want to give your competition the ideas you have.
5. You don’t need anyone polluting the dream God planted within you.
Sometimes the people around us are trying to use logic to guide us. And sometimes LOGIC isn’t all that is needed to make moves. I’m sure the people who created light, cars, and airplanes didn’t seem logical to others at times. Truthfully, logic isn’t always needed to get to the next level. Sometimes, God wants you to live your dream so badly that He’ll help you make a way!
There are so many stories about celebrities that were told by people closest to them that they’d NEVER make it. Lady Gaga’s boyfriend was one. Yet she defied the odds and became a mega star. Or we can see in the Bible when Joseph told his brothers about his BIG DREAM they were jealous. They ended up trying to kill him. Ultimately, it’s important to watch what you share with others!
Whoever guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble. Proverbs 21:23
3. Find Your Tribe
Moving in silence doesn’t mean that you have to do things alone, be your only encourager, reject constructive criticism, cut everyone off, and fear everyone is out to get you. It means you should do things with a small circle that is FOR YOU. It also means you should filter the people in your life by levels (acquaintances, friends, close friends, business partners, etc.)
Ultimately, it’s vital to learn which individuals can be a safe space for all the treasures in your heart. It’s also okay to have different people for different activities. For instance, you can have a fun friend, a business friend, and a friend you share all your emotional jewels with. But be careful, because the lines between casual relationships/friendships can become blurry really quick. Especially when others are pushing for more access into your life than you feel safe enough to give.
Your tribe shouldn’t be jealous, distract you, judge you, manipulate you, control you, criticize you, and make you feel SMALL. Your tribe should be growth minded, encourage you, offer constructive OPINIONS, be patient with you, and align with your values.
Where to find a tribe?
1. Find a mastermind group with people in your field.
2. Consult with me for 20 minutes of Empowerment Coaching!
3. Visit a support group OR seek 1:1 therapy!
4. Mind Your Business
Do you have energy to chase your dreams, love yourself well, enjoy your loved ones, and strengthen your spiritual walk? Too often, we get so busy doing things and focusing on things that have NOTHING to do with our personal values. If that’s you, then it’s time to take back your energy and shift your focus.
THINGS TO FOCUS ON:
- Create specific goals and fiercely purse them.
- Make a schedule and put specific times to talk on the phone and hang out with people.
- Limit your use of social media (I use screen time and I had someone else set the passcode for me.)
- Avoid getting into silly arguments and sticky situations that just don’t matter.
- Stick to your schedule and decide to work on achieving goals in silence.
- Get a mentor to help you get unstuck.
People with a vision mind their business by focusing on the TOP priorities within their life. Oprah paid no attention to the people that said she wasn’t pretty enough for TV. Presidential candidates don’t stop to worry about how the news is slandering them. I don’t try to fix things when others are rejecting my advice. And I don’t concern myself with everyone else’s drama.
What is your main FOCUS?
1. Is that friend distracting you from your goals and values?
2. Are you overly involved in someone else’s life and emotions?
3. Do you try to make others better?
4. Do you make decisions to make someone else happy?
5. Do you push past your emotions to make others comfortable?
6. Are you afraid to say no?
7. Do you give advice when no one asked?
8. Are you always talking about drama and celebrity gossip?
9. Are you inviting toxic people and unnecessary drama into your life?
10. Are you trying to earn the approval or applause of others?
11. Are you trying to show off to others that you’re moving in silence?
The term Mind Your Own Business means: to look into your own matter, keep it to yourself, avoid taking interest into someone else’s matter, refrain from interfering in other people’s affairs, do not show any concern about the matters of others.
5. GLOW UP Silently
When you’re moving in silence, it’s also an opportunity to upgrade yourself behind the scenes. And when it’s time for the spotlight, let the world be WOW’d by your mental, physical, and spiritual growth.
AREAS TO GLOW UP:
- 5 Steps To Level Up As A Woman
- 7 Causes of Pride: How to be More Humble!
- Find Your Inner Power After A Toxic Relationship!
- QUIZ: Why are you attracting the wrong men?
- 10 Tips To Not Let Things Bother & Irritate You!
- 6 Steps to Know God Intimately + Verses!
- QUIZ: Are You Carrying Emotional Baggage?
“Work hard in silence, let your success make the noise.” – Frank Ocean