I’m sorry no one understands the pain and confusion that you feel at this moment. Time is slowly passing away: days, weeks, months or years… And you may not know who to talk to!
Do your friends think you should suck it up and move on? But, how can you? How can you forget about the most amazing love story you have ever experienced? Or, how can you make the pain of what they did disappear?
Are your emotions going back and forth at lightning speed? In one moment, you hate them for the pain they caused you… But, in the next moment you would give anything up to have them near you again. Sweetie, you’re not crazy. You were strong enough to truly love. Don’t ever regret having a beautiful heart, that cared deeply for another person.
I hope these prompts will help ease some of your pain and put you on the road to recovery. If you need more help, I can speak with you 1:1 when you try 20 minutes of free empowerment coaching and start your healing process!
Related Article: An Empowering Letter To Women Healing From Emotional Abuse
Letting Go of A Toxic Relationship
- Evaluating a Toxic Relationship:
- Do you think of yourself as a good partner? Why or why not?
- Are you mostly happy or sad in this relationship?
- Are you afraid to speak or be yourself in this relationship?
- Do you notice any differences about yourself in this relationship?
- What is the main issue in the relationship?
- Do you hold any guilt or shame for how things are going?
- Considering the Path Forward:
- What have you already done to save the relationship?
- Are you losing yourself and getting stressed trying to fix it?
- How would counseling affect you and your partner?
- What do you fear the most about leaving this relationship?
- What are the pros of staying with your partner?
- What are the cons of staying with your partner?
- What would you think if someone you cared about was in a relationship like this?
- How long have you been in the same emotional space with your partner?
- Embracing Happiness and Healing:
- What is the best path to bring you happiness and healing?
- Do you fear being single? Why?
- What would you do if you weren’t stressed about this relationship?
Journal Prompts for Correcting The Story
The story you believe about this relationship will play a major factor in your healing process. Often times, dysfunctional relationships cause us to see ourselves incorrectly and take on false/negative beliefs. These questions will help you delve deeper into your heart and mind for any memory or belief you have that is an obstacle in your healing process.
- Did anyone ever warn you about relationships being this painful? What would you have done differently if you knew about toxic relationships?
- Do you think someone that hasn’t been in a toxic relationship has the capacity to understand you? How much should you share with others that haven’t had such an experience?
- Do you have anyone that understands your healing process? Why or why not?
- Have you been upset with yourself for taking time to heal? Are you being gentle with yourself?
- Do you blame yourself? Why?
- Do you feel like a victim in the situation? Why do you feel helpless?
Related Article: Find Your Inner Power After A Toxic Relationship!
- Do you wish you would have done something differently? What would you have done differently?
- What behavior or specific event still brings you pain (ex. cheating)? Why?
- Do you think their bad behavior had to do with you? Or was their behavior based on getting their emptiness filled?
- Is it fair to judge your past self? Is it unfair to allow your wiser self to criticize your younger self?
- Did you get to speak up against unfair treatment? Why or why not?
- Were there any outsiders that judged you? Was their perspective accurate?
- What behavior did you use that makes you embarrassed? What emotional needs were you trying to meet?
- Did anyone ever teach you how to get your emotional needs met in a healthy way? Did your guardians know how to get their needs met?
Journal Prompts for Getting Closure
- What do you think caused the relationship to end?
- What if nothing you did could have made it better?
- Do you have hopes that your partner will change and you will both be together again?
- Can you be in a relationship with someone that isn’t able to grow?
- Why would someone feel it’s too painful to grow and overcome their trauma?
- Do you think parents pass on the same unhealed generational traumas to their children?
- Were you and your partner repeating patterns that your parents had?
Related Article: 4 Tips For Finding Peace After a Toxic Relationship
- If your partner had healed do you think they would of loved you better?
- What do you wish you could of said to your partner? Write a letter explaining your feelings.
- What is something you are still confused about? Why do you think it happened?
- If you were confident, sure of yourself, and aware of healthy partners would you have dated this person in the beginning? Why or why not?
- How well are you dealing with your emotions? Are you actively healing or avoiding them?
- Is it wrong to see the beauty in the relationship as well as the bad? Why or why not?
- Do you feel judged by anyone for loving your partner? Or for getting into a relationship with them?
Journal Prompts for Forgiveness
- Do you have un-forgiveness in your heart?
- Are you angry with yourself? Why?
- Are you angry with your ex? Why?
- What do you wish would have happened differently?
- How would you feel if you let go of the pain?
Emotional Healing Prompts for Toxic Relationships
- Everyone desires to feel loved, safe, respected, and valued. A dysfunctional relationship happens when at least one person forces the other to meet their needs. What emotional needs were you forced to meet? And in the beginning, what need was your partner meeting within you?
- It’s hard to have healthy communication when one person feels like the victim or that everyone is out to get them. How was communication in your relationship? Did you feel like you were walking on eggshells?
- The painful events that have happened in our lives can keep us emotionally stuck. Were you or your partner emotionally stuck and heal from painful memories?
- Unhealthy partners have a way of doing the wrong thing and then they never take responsibility for it. Are you blaming yourself for fixing their mistake? Did they blame you for their own mistake? Is it healthy for you to take the blame for this situation?
- We usually date partners that are just as insecure, scared, codependent, and unaware of how special they truly are. In what ways were you and your partner similar? In what area can you heal to avoid a similar toxic pairing in the future?
Related Article: 78 Affirmations For Healing Trauma
- People often fear other people leaving them, so they use unhealthy coping mechanisms to ensure their partner stays. Did your partner use manipulation, blame-shifting, and lying to ensure you always thought positively of them? Did you use people-pleasing to ensure that your partner was happy and didn’t lash out?
- Codependent relationships occur when two broken individuals make each other feel safe. Are you feel anxious away from your partner? Do you feel empty and purposeless without your partner?
- How can you avoid taking on the savior role in a relationship?
- What internal red flags or bad gut feelings can you point out that shows you’re entering into a toxic relationship?
- Do you think when people use your insecurities against you that’s a red flag?
You don’t have to heal alone! Let me help you!I can speak with you 1:1 when you try 20 minutes of free empowerment coaching and start your healing process!
Betrayal Trauma Journal Prompts
A betrayal is deeply painful and traumatizing because someone you least expected hurts you. The emotions that you experience after a betrayal is the “trauma”. The trauma usually causes us to become distrustful, paranoid, fearful, and overly cautious to prevent pain.
Use these prompts that start a sentence and finish it with something that caters to your emotional needs.
- The behavior of others is not my fault because….
- It’s not fair that I have to be on guard with people I love because…
- I shouldn’t blame myself because I’m not…
- I will release the guilt caused by…
- I am not to blame because…
- I will release the fear of others hurting me by…
- I can actively protect my heart by…
- I will open my heart to receive…
- I am capable of attracting…
- I will heal and then I will be able to…
Related Article: 5 Steps to Heal Betrayal Trauma Triggers
Prompts for Boundaries After Narcissistic Abuse
- What are your non-negotiables in relationships and friendships?
- Are you comfortable loving someone from afar?
- Is it possible to forgive someone without letting them back in your heart?
- How do you know that someone has truly changed?
- How can you tell when someone is telling you what you want to hear?
- How much access should you give someone that has hurt you repeatedly?
- Is it hard to ignore someone and put boundaries up when they’re in pain?
- Will God take care of someone you can’t?
- How do you identity someone that takes more than they give?
- How can the word “no” help you avoid toxic situations?
Related Article: Empaths Attract Narcissists in Relationship: 3 Keys To End Cycle!
Prompts to Find Inner Power And Peace
- In this relationship, what did you learn to protect yourself from pain?
- If you trusted your gut more often, how would that help? If you were right about what you thought of people, how would that affect you?
- In what environment do you feel the most peaceful in?
- What can you do to invite more peace into your life?
- Do you often say yes before considering if you’re tired or have things to do? Is this a healthy behavior if you want peace in your life?
- Do you save some of your energy for yourself? Or do you burn yourself out doing things for others?
- What is your biggest fear? How can you take steps to overcome?
- What is your inner power? Strength, wisdom, charisma, empathy, or nurturing?
- What is your purpose in life? What can you do to make the world a better place?
Related Article: Find Your Inner Power After A Toxic Relationship!
Journal Prompts to Rediscover Your Authentic Self
- What do you wish you believed about yourself?
- What is your greatest strength?
- Do you treat others better than yourself?
- Do you believe compliments? Why or why not?
- What do people mostly compliment you on?
- Do you know how to receive love? How do you receive love?
- If you could change something about yourself what would it be?
- What are you really good at doing? Do you do it often?
- What is your personality like? What would most others like about your personality?
- How do you want people to think about you or see about you?