How to Start Fasting and Praying for a Future Husband

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We tend to accept partners, friendships, and situations based on the level of healing that we have. From a broken place, we enter into relationships that disrupt our peace, distract us from God, and delay our purpose. Ultimately, many enter unhealthy relationships because they were chasing the desires of their heart and not God.

Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4

I accepted men that were insecure, feared rejection, and were unable to take personal responsibility. I would try to make them feel loved and feed into their insecurities because it made me feel secure. I loved proving to men that I was the most powerful love they’d ever feel and I’d never leave them. It made me feel loved to make them feel loved. However, I’m not God and when I fell short they reverted to their broken tendencies.

And, I would seek relationships that filled my emotional needs. God taught me that this was idolatry. God wanted to heal my loneliness, insecurities, pain, and fears. He wanted to be the source of life, joy, and love in my life. My advice for you is to pursue inner healing, so that you can find a man that is on the same wave length as you. And secondly, fast and pray for a Godly man.

Related Article: 5 Reasons You’re Dreaming About A Future Husband

1. Create a Husband List

What type of man are you waiting on God for? It’s time to decide what type of man YOU want in your life. Write a list of the perfect attributes of your soulmate.  When you write it down, then you should pray for God to release your hopes and desires to you in His timing!

Here are a few traits I value:

• He’s humble and can admit wrong
• Gentle kindness describe his actions and speech
• Honesty is important to him
• Healthy emotional life and no hidden sin
• Wisdom guides him in all he does
• He isn’t easily angered because he’s patient
• He listens to God and isn’t rebellious
• A man who fights to stay connected to me and God
• He is sober-minded and makes good decisions
• I am comfortable submitting because he’s a good leader
• He is a good communicator and isn’t afraid of hard conversations

Related Article: 4 Signs of a Godly Man + Bible Verses!

2. Pursue Inner Healing

Before meeting your husband, it’s important to fast and pray for God to purify your heart. Inner brokenness can cause conflict and never ending issues within your marriage.

It will make it easier to identify your partner's level of healing when you're healed.

Pray and fast for inner healing in these areas:

• Insecurities: Do you need a man to feel beautiful, seen, and special? What will happen when your man can’t do this? Will you feel rejected and resentful towards him?
• Purpose + calling: Do you know what space God has called you to? Are you waiting on your husband to follow God’s will for your life? Ultimately, seek God for your individual purpose and you’ll know if your husband aligns with your life when you meet him.
• Emotional Lack: Do you feel lonely, depressed, and empty without a man? That emptiness will never be filled by him and you may resent that He can’t.
• Distrust in God: Can you trust God to minister to your spouse when you’re both in a disagreement? Will you use manipulation, control, lying, and other tactics to get your spouse to do what you want?
• Generational patterns: Is there a pattern of divorce, anger, addiction, passiveness, people-pleasing, and financial issues in your family? If you haven’t broken that pattern with God, there is a strong likelihood it will repeat in your life.
• Expectations: There is a potential that you may expect your husband to be your best friend, like what you like, clean how you clean, be romantic, communicate how you communicate, and make you feel loved. However, it takes WORK to get to that place. Your relationship might be a struggle in the beginning as you both heal and learn each other’s desires.
• Childhood Trauma: Poor treatment from our parents, friends, teachers, siblings, and family members leaves wounds in our hearts. It can cause you to fear the same type of treatment unconsciously. For example, if you had a parent that was absent you may expect people to leave you OR you might struggle with fear of abandonment, loneliness, inability to understand love, etc.
• Pain from past relationships: Unconsciously, we store the pain from previous relationships, including friendships. Pain from past relationships leave a scar on our souls whether we notice or not. God has to remove the trauma of those situations, so your body doesn’t subconsciously fear these patterns repeating.
• Fear of being Rejected: When your man does something that makes you feel unwanted, how will you respond? Can you remain righteous, kind, and loving?
• Fear of Abandonment: Are you afraid of your man leaving? Will you control him to ensure he stays? Or will you try to do everything perfectly so he stays?
• Staying open: Can you remain kind, loving, and hopeful despite pain? This is true vulnerability which is needed for a healthy relationship.

3. Start Fasting and Praying for Your Future Husband

Fasting and praying helps you to hear what God wants for your life clearer. When you hear God’s voice clearly you will pray for things that He wants to do in your love life. Also, fasting gives God the opportunity to cleanse your heart and ensure you aren’t praying from impure motives. Here is a guide to ensure your heart is in the right place of purity as you fast and pray.

You start a fast picking the type of fast you want: social media fast, liquid fast, sun up to sun down fast, sugar fast, and Daniel Fast. Once you select the type of fast, then you should set up a daily schedule to talk to God (pray), read the Bible, and worship God.

When you fast you will break toxic cycles, demonic strongholds, and generational curses. Also, you are getting filled with the fruits of the spirit, you’re able to access God’s peace, you’ll deepen your relationships with God, and you’ll feel more content as you wait on God. Ultimately, you’ll enjoy all the benefits of intimacy with God.

Expect that God wants to tell you intricate details as you wait. He wants to talk to you about:

1. How to prepare your inner and external life for your man.
2. Steps to spot and pick the right man to compliment you.
3. How to remain content in God at all times.
4. Your ability to trust God in hard times.

Related Article: 23 Signs God is Preparing You for a Relationship

What prayers to say while fasting?

You should say prayers that focus on the spiritual maturity of you and your future husband. And you should pray that you are both in God’s divine timing to meet, date, and get married.

You should pray that your husband:

• Is protected from Satanic temptations: O’ Lord, I ask that you would protect my husband from the schemes of the enemy. I ask that you would keep him pure and righteous in your sight. I declare that he has laser vision and focus to follow your leading, right now.
• Submits to the leading of the Lord: Father in heaven, thank you for guiding my husband into your will. I ask that he would have clear discernment, so he doesn’t stray from your path.
• Has a pure heart: O’ Lord, I ask that you search my husband’s heart and cleanse it from pride, anger, lust, rebellion, deceit, fear, and control. Thank you Father because as I pray he is letting go of control and dying to his flesh.
• Is filled with fruits of the spirit: Abba father, thank you for filling my husband with “….love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, [and] self-control…” – Galatians 5:22-23
• Has financial and career success: O’ Lord, bless my husband with promotions, jobs, and favor so that he can do your will. I ask that he would work unto you and not unto man. I thank you that he is stable and can keep a job. I thank you that he is financially wise, saves, and a cheerful giver.
• Can make good decisions: Father, I desire a man that seeks you for decisions and moves swiftly at the sound of your voice. Thank you father that you are preparing my husband’s heart and mind to make great decisions that honor you and brings good fruits.
• Has great community: I thank you papa for surrounding my husband with good family, friends, and spiritual mentors. I thank you that he is accountable to them and he considers their guidance. I ask that he would feel loved and seen by his community. Thank you that he hears their wisdom and it’s guiding him in the right direction.
• Will fight for connection: O’ Lord, I pray that my husband would become bold and focused in his pursuit of you. I thank you that his submission to you will lead him to me. I ask that he wouldn’t waste time and he wouldn’t let insecurities or anything hinder him from fiercely coming after me.

Prayer for A Future Husband

O' Lord, thank you for putting excitement in my spirit for my Godly match. I thank you that you see the end from the beginning and you have good things in store for me. I ask that you'd remove any fear, pain, and unhealed areas in my heart. Father, help me to be whole and secure in you, so I don't depend on my husband to be my source of love, life, and happiness. You make me complete God. You make me whole. I thank you God, for loving me to the depth of my core. I ask that my husband would experience the depth and width of your love as well.

I ask that we would both understand your love so much that it would be obvious when someone doesn't truly love us. I pray that we wouldn't be emotionally attracted to partners that are not for us. Thank you for giving us strength and confidence to trust your warnings that someone is not our spouse.  Protect us from counterfeits, toxic relationships, and partners that would seek to harm us. I ask for discernment and revelation so we can see the depths of their heart. I trust you to guide my dating life Father and I put my heart in your hand. Thank you for helping us to know our personalities, likes, dislikes, strengths and weaknesses. I believe you will guide us both to each other because we compliment each other. 

Thank you father because in our time of singleness you are boldly equipping us. You're teaching us about our calling and how we can love your Body. Help us to both begin walking in our Godly purpose. Help us to hear your direction to walk in the power of the Gospel. I desire to be a testimony of your love God. I also desire that my future marriage would magnify your name and promote the kingdom of God. Thank you for teaching my husband and I about the Bible and loving others. I'm excited to be in a relationship that is ordained by you God! I trust you Abba. Amen. 

Related Article: Are You Tired of Waiting On God for a Husband?