#1 Sign To Find Out: Does he like me?

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#1 Sign To Find Out: Does he like me?

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Ugh, I’m sorry that you have to worry about this! This is such a complex issue and the truth is… every situation and experience is different. He could and he could not.

My advice?

Never settle for lack of peace, sudden confusion and ambiguity.

You deserve to be in a situation where you are not playing guessing games. If you find yourself in this space of confusion– I suggest kindly talking to the person to bring clarity. You deserve to be with someone that wants to have honest communication of their feelings with you.

You can put a stop to the confusion by asking the right questions.

Having a simple conversation can help bring clarity to any situation. I have initiated this conversation with males before; I had to be upfront about my feelings.  There is nothing wrong with being a bold woman… The truth is you should be humble and confident enough to pursue transparent conversations with the people in your life. For me, it was nerve-wracking but a bit comfortable because the guys I’ve been interested in were friends that I had somewhat a relationship with.

Related Article: Self-Esteem Test: 10 Signs You’re Insecure!

Your ability and his ability to engage in a  “high tension conversation” is a reflection of how both of you would deal with conflict inside of a romantic relationship.  As you talk… take note of how he deals with your heart – That’s exactly how he would treat you in a relationship!

After the dreaded conversations or  putting myself out there in obvious but subtle ways… I have seen different situations end with different results. The results were different because the reasons for the mixed messages and ambiguity were different.  The reasons for mixed messages may include: shyness, uncertainty of how the other feels,  insecurity and the male just wanting to flirt/be wanted!

In all the situations, I got to the end of my rope and I initiated something that brought light to the situation. All situations do not end well but that doesn’t matter. The goal of figuring out if he is interested should be to bring peace.

If your conversation goes favorably and they are interested — Congratulations! But, if the other person is not interested but you felt they gave you mixed messages create boundaries. (Read More: Games & the Dark Side of Flirting)

Boundaries help protect your heart. Boundaries say, “You may not be trying to give me mixed messages… But my heart is hurting and I cannot give you access to that part of my heart.”  You can start the process by limiting your interaction with the person to group situations, limiting the amount of times you see the person to once a month, and speaking with them about limited topics — nothing too vulnerable. There are multiple things to do but it really depends on the situation, the health of your heart, and the type of role that person plays in your life.

Related Article: Self-Esteem Test: 10 Signs You’re Insecure!

I do suggest speaking with a mentor about the best ways for you to draw boundaries! OR head over to the Advice Café for specific insight from an Adorned-Heart contributor!

The truth is… You have to GUARD your heart! If another person is causing your heart to enter dangerous territory… Decide to steer it in a different direction. God withholds no GOOD thing. So, if the door with this crush is closed… God will open another door that is good for you!

Sister, you deserve the best.

For God is not a God of confusion but of peace. -1 Corinthians 14:33 ESV

Christina Daniels is the founder of Adorned Heart. She is devoted to learning about human behavior and its affects on society. She received a B.A. in Psychology and M.A. in Public Policy. She hopes to use her life and academic experience to empower & heal the hearts of women!

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